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Archives for October 2019

#AllieReadsOctober: Parenting Books

October 30, 2019 by Allie Casazza Leave a Comment

I don’t know if you’ve heard but I have a billion kids. Not really. I have four, but it feels like a billion. 

And I’ve read a lot of parenting books. But during #AllieReadsOctober I want to share 5 books that stand out to me in a sea of reading that have helped shape me as a parent and why. 

Disclaimer: I’ll be sharing some of my parenting beliefs with you. I don’t typically do that because I just don’t like to, but I feel like I kind of have to in order to explain how exactly these books have shaped me.

These are just my parenting beliefs and philosophies. You can love them or hate them, take them or leave them, that’s totally your choice and your prerogative. Just like it’s my choice and my prerogative to share them.

I’m here to help but what I say will not help everyone or even be liked by everyone. So, don’t put that expectation on me and I won’t put any expectation on you to like them. 

One of the biggest most redundant lessons I’ve learned (that you’ll see in a pattern throughout the books I’m going to list) is this: your kids want to be heard and loved. That’s it.

When they feel that way, they are able to give respect back. I have a parenting belief built on mutual respect.  

I’m here for my children. I want to hear from them. 

I want to hear how they feel and I want them to know they can come and tell me if there’s something that they think should be changed. But I make the final judgement call because I know what’s best for them. 

There’s absolutely discipline. There are natural consequences in the world and in life and it’s my job as the parent to teach them that, but discipline can be done respectfully. 

The way I discipline and parent my kids used to look very different than it does now. But I believe in what Maya Angelou said: “Know better. Do better.” 

And I have these books to thank for this shift in my parenting. 

There are a lot of books you can read that might have parts that you don’t agree with or even want to enact into your own life. And that’s OK. You can absolutely still learn from them.

I kind of scratch my head when people freak out on someone and start bashing them about something they said or wrote that they don’t agree with. Listen, we’re not always going to agree with everyone. 

That doesn’t mean that the other person isn’t doing something good in the world. It doesn’t mean that you can’t learn from them. 

The expression, “Get the meat and throw out the bones” is absolutely valid. It’s important to take in content through that lens and that philosophy and release the author from the expectation of making you perfectly happy. 

Another thing I want to tell you before I share these books is that I’m much better off walking through parenting mindfully and prayerfully than I am reading about what to do or what someone else thinks I should do. 

My kids are different, they’re their own people. I’m different, I’m my own person, and I’m a better parent for my kids than any author can be. Once I got that, and really believed it confidently, things shifted for me and I became a better mom.

But that’s not to say that books aren’t helpful because they most definitely are. I’m a firm believer in that obviously. 

So, here are the top 5 books that have shaped the way I’m raising my kids.

The Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson

This book brought a lot of clarity on pressing pause and being a slow parent and creating space to be available for your kids. You guys know I’m really big on that and this book made that idea be born in me.  

I have a very full life. I’m a very fulfilled woman outside of my motherhood. I have my business. I have my hobbies. I have my exercise goals and other goals and I do not rely on my children to fulfill me. 

But they are my priority underneath Brian. I adore being a mom and I always make sure that I have time and space for my children and they know that I would call off the whole day if they needed something from me. 

Sally Clarkson’s story and examples really paved the path for me to be that way. I’m super grateful to her for the example that she set. 

Although she’s much more in the conservative, traditional Christian camp than I am today, she shaped me as a mom.

This is one of the very best books. 

Operation Blessing by Billie Kaye Tsika 

Let me first start off by saying that I don’t really recommend that you buy this book. You might look at the title and think that this is such a great book. But it is the weirdest, most random little book of all time. 

The author has actually said that she wrote this book for her family and you can definitely tell. It has pictures of this woman, her husband and her grandkids in it. She describes the personalities of each of her grandkids and it has specific blessings that she spoke over them. 

So, it’s a very personal book. I wouldn’t buy it again. 

But what this book did for me and the reason I’m even mentioning it is that it taught me about speaking out truth and hope and life and blessing over my kids. 

One of my most popular episodes of The Purpose Show of all time is about speaking life over your kids. You can listen to that episode here. 

This book helped spark the idea in me that what we say to our kids matters and it led me on a hunt in learning more about affirmations and the spiritual and biblical ties to that idea because I was not taught that in the school that I was raised in. 

This book is very Biblically based so, if you’re not a Christian don’t get this book because you’re going to hate it. 


What you say to your family and over them matters.

I’ve put together a FREE PDF of affirmations that you can start speaking over your kids TODAY!

SEND ME THE FREE PDF!

No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson

This is the book that really shifted my perspective and helped me see that kids just want to be seen, known, heard and understood. This book honestly broke my heart because I saw how damaging spanking is and how non-constructive time out can be for young kids. 

And that’s the kind of discipline that I thought was good in the very early years of my motherhood. That’s what I thought was right. 

Now I know for myself that it’s not right and, through this book, I really learned the negative effects of that style of discipline and how to discipline instead to get to my kids’ hearts. 

It taught me how to hear them, how to get them to hear me, and how to speak to them in a way that made them feel loved and understood. 

I fully believe that kids need parents. They don’t need parents to be their friends. But I know I can parent without harsh punishment. I knew it then but I just didn’t know what to do instead. 

This book gave me the information on what to do instead and I’m so thankful for that. It gives you strategies to help you kind of find your own discipline philosophy and figure out the best methods for you acting out that philosophy. 

This book doesn’t say, “Here’s how to parent,” and I really appreciate that. The authors just explain the facts. 

They explain the neuroscience behind everything and then they say, “Here are some options. You can do this, you can do that. Here are some strategies. Here are some facts on child development and what kind of discipline is most appropriate and helpful for different ages. Here’s how to stay calm and collected in your discipline and how to stay connected to your child no matter how your child’s behaving. Here’s how to deal with tantrums and have empathy and how to repair a damaged relationship because of incorrect discipline in the past.”

This book is so deep and insightful. I highly recommend that every single parent read this. Absolutely one of the best books I’ve ever read. It totally changed my perspective and helped me see what my kids need from me. 

How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish

The main thing that stayed with me about this book is that the authors gave real-life examples. They wrote about scenarios that actually come up often in parenting and then wrote about what not to do versus what would be more effective. 

This book is super easy to understand. It’s almost written in a “for dummies” format. It’s really easy to take action on. 

I felt a lot of clarity after every page I read. I had to read it very slowly because I was like, Wow. I can’t believe I didn’t realize this!” Or “I can’t believe I wasn’t already doing it this way!” 

This is a really good book. It’s one of those books you’ll want to have on your shelf so you can reference it later. 

Why I Didn’t Rebel by Rebecca Lindenbach 

If there is one book you buy from this blog post, let it be this one!

This book is so good. I’m literally like an evangelist for it because I’m constantly telling people to get it. 

Rebecca has been a guest on The Purpose Show (listen here) and she wrote this book as a college student after she was just asked all the time, “What made you not rebel? Why didn’t you rebel when other kids who were raised by great parents did?” 

The one thing I love about this book is that it’s non-partisan. Rebecca herself is a Christian, but it’s not a Christian book. She’s very unbiased. She’s just stating the facts. 

It’s really a scientific study book on kids who rebelled versus kids who didn’t. She interviews a lot of younger people—some had parents of faith, some didn’t—and there are all these different results but they all have common denominators. 

This is another book that just cemented my belief that it’s not supposed to be, “I’m the parent. You sit down and listen no matter what.” But rather a relationship of mutual respect. 

This was a new idea in parenting that I’d never heard before and wasn’t taught—especially in school. So, if you’re going to get one book, get this one. Read this one. 

OK, there are 5 books that really shifted and shaped my parenting beliefs. I hope these were helpful for you. 

I would ask that if you’re going to purchase any of these books that you would purchase them from the links I provided above. It’s just kind of a “thank you!” for my taking the time to put this list together for you and I really appreciate it!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

#AllieReadsOctober: What I Read This Year

October 16, 2019 by Allie Casazza Leave a Comment

I think you guys probably know by now that I am a huge bookworm. I absolutely love to read. 

Books are actually the one item that I’m not minimal about. I love my books, and I reference lots of them again and again or lend them to friends (I’m the friend that’s constantly recommending books!).

This month is #AllieReadsOctober, and I did this last year where I shared with you the books that I’d read throughout the year. And I’m back doing it again this year! 

I’m not sharing every single thing I read this year, but these are the books that I feel are worth mentioning and that I would encourage you to read. 

When I make these lists I don’t go through my shelves and scan for books. I sit at my desk and I don’t let myself look at my book collection and I just think, “What books stood out to me? What made an impact? What do I remember off the top of my head because it was that good?” 

These are those books! And I’m so excited to share them with you because I know how overwhelming it can be to find your next read. And how much it sucks when you spend time and money on a book and then you really hate it. Or worse, you find that you really disagree with the message. 

So, I’m hoping to help you avoid that and to help you comprise a really great reading list. 

I am linking all these books in this post and they are affiliate links! I appreciate you clicking to buy via MY link as a thank you for doing #AllieReadsOctober. 

OK, I know that not all of you are entrepreneurs, but the truth is I read a lot of business books this year. So, I’m going to share a short list of business books for those of you who are entrepreneurs, and then I’ll get to my list of “regular life” books for those of you who aren’t. 


Sidenote: I’ve been doing business coaching and LOVING it.

I have a couple of spots available right now so, if you are an entrepreneur and you want to grow your business like mine has grown (from zero to multiple 7 figures in less than 2 years), I’d love to help you.

I know what to do and I know how to “do it yourself.” I didn’t pay for any ads or hire any help for a very long time.

I did everything on my own and everything organically—with four kids in tow (and I was homeschooling). Everyone’s story is going to be different, but I know how to grow a business and I’d love to help you grow or start your business.

So, follow this link and let’s take action and get you where you want to go! 

Learn more

Now, let’s get down to biz…ness books. 

Jab Jab Right Hook by Gary Vaynerchuk

Gary Vaynerchuck’s branding is very masculine and abrasive. And he is too. BUT his wisdom is just incomparable. This book is very visual. It basically gives examples of social media posts on every platform there is. He dissects the good, the bad, and the ugly of corporate social media, and dives into why this post really sucked or why this post was really, really smart. The book is full of just genius marketing examples. I loved it. It really helped me. I sent it to my Facebook ads person and they also loved it. So, this is just a really good visual book to have on hand when you’re forming your social media posts. 

Tapping Into Wealth by Margaret Lynch

If you’re not aware of what tapping is, it’s almost like a combination of mindfulness and affirmations with the way your body works. It’s a really unique area, and this was a really unique read for me. It’s definitely not for everybody so, research it before you buy it. Having said that, it did help me tremendously in that it helped me fine-tune what my goals are, what I want for my business, what I want for the money that we make in the business and how I want to use it, and also, how open I am to receiving that money.

I absolutely believe that you can stop the flow of money in your life. I had a lot of money blocks and mindset issues surrounding money when I started my business and this book really helped me work through some issues relating to that. 

You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero 

This is a follow-up to the book, “You Are a Badass”—which I believe I mentioned in #AllieReadsOctober last year. But I’m bringing up this version because it’s that good. If you struggle with feeling weird about money, or about making money, or if you can’t seem to make any at all, read this book. Whether you own a business or not, read this book. It’s that amazing. 

Launch by Jeff Walker

This is kind of a classic. And I feel like I was one of the last people to read it. If you’re looking to launch a digital product—or anything really—this book is a great place to start. Jeff also has a program about this strategy that he sells, as well. So, you could check that out too. 

Chillpreneur by Denise Duffield-Thomas

Denise is a money-mindset teacher. And she’s my favorite. She’s Austrailian and I love listening to her talk. Her wisdom, her expertise, and the way she speaks so graciously to the people who follow her is just so good and refreshing. I am almost finished with this book and it’s just been incredible. Denise has genius ideas about how to have a business and a life that you love without being so overworked, overrun, and overloaded with work stuff that you hate your job and your life. So, this is a super important read. 

OK, that’s it for the business side of things. Let’s dive into the other books I read and loved this year! 

The Wellness Project by Phoebe Lapine

This book is basically like a journal that the author kept on a year-long wellness journey. The author was having some health issues and so, she decided that each month she would focus on totally-clean-no-chemical-nothing-fake-wellness in a different area of her life (like her eating, her drinking, her beauty products, and so on).

The message behind this book really spoke to me because, as I’ve shared before, I’ve been going through a wellness journey myself and I’ve been learning so much. So, I was curious to read what this woman did and what she learned. My biggest takeaway from this book was to just be mindful of what you put on and in your body. And also that you don’t have to do everything at once.

This book is really fun! It’s a really light and easy read. And it’s cute too! It would be really cute to have on your coffee table—which I care about so, I just want to plug that in there.

Triggers by Marshall Goldsmith

This book was so good. I actually just had a really big conversation with my little brother about it and I gave him my copy (which he’s reading and loving already). It’s basically about how your environment has a serious effect on you and is really responsible for a lot of what you say, think and do. The author gives an example from his own life of how he and his wife would often have dinner with their neighbors—who were also a couple. These neighbors would often have really snarky, sarcastic, blunt, and negative senses of humor. 

My own sense of humor is really dry and sarcastic. And you either love it or hate it. So, I was like, “Pay attention to this section of the book, Allie.” 

But anyway, this guy’s neighbors had taken that kind of humor to an extreme. They were just extremely negative and they would come over and joke about their other neighbors and make fun of the way they mowed their lawns or dealt with their pets, or whatever. And the author found that whenever he and his wife would eat dinner with these people, they would take on that personality type and they would join in and also be kind of rude and gossip-y even though they normally weren’t like that at all. And it just showed that what you are around, you become.

So, it’s really important to have boundaries and to be guarded and aware of your environment. He goes on to teach about when to avoid an environment and what to do when you can’t avoid a certain environment but it’s negatively affecting you in a big way. He writes about how to counter it. This is a super life-changing, amazing book. I highly recommend that every person read it because our environments have a serious effect on us. 

Jesus Feminist by Sarah Bessey

I actually read this book last year and then I read it again this year. I love it so much. I absolutely cannot say enough about this book. I get really emotional when I think about it, and I want to talk more about this soon. It’s been heavy on my heart for about a year, but it’s a careful conversation that I want to have at the right time. But this book changed my life. Deeply. I was brought up in a private, Christian school where I felt that I was taught that women are not leaders. Women are secondary and women are not made to be strong except for, you know, childbirth.

This issue really came up for me as an adult when I began my business and I realized that I was becoming the entrepreneur that I was made to be but didn’t think I could be because I was told I shouldn’t be. This book woke me up to what I was missing out on—the calling I was missing out on. Growing up I was told that women shouldn’t be focused on anything but their families. That it’s wrong to focus on anything else. That message was so black and white for me. And honestly, I still receive receive messages like that from women who believe that way. And the thing is, I understand why they believe that way. Because I did too.

But I read this book alongside my Bible. I referenced and re-referenced things. I looked things up and read different translations of different Scriptures. I talked to people. I talked to my pastor. I asked questions. I prayed. I sat in this idea and asked God for guidance so many times. This wasn’t something I read lightly. And my biggest takeaway was that the Bible does not condemn women in power. And that everything I was taught (well, most everything) about the role of women was wrong. That set me free and gave me so much joy. It lifted me up and changed my life in a very, very deep way. And I’m so grateful to my God for bringing the right resources into my life when I needed them, and I’m so grateful to Sarah Bessey for writing such a brave and difficult book.

I’m so passionate about coming up against the belief that women cannot do anything in leadership. That they shouldn’t be the breadwinners; that they shouldn’t lead anything. I’m so against that. And it feels so good to say that. For so long I was asking, “Why God? Why did you give me all these ideas? Why did you give me this business if it’s wrong?” And this book was such a huge part of my self-discovery and the discovery of truth.

That’s all I’ll say here, but if you were raised in the typical, traditional camp and you have also struggled with this, please read this book. My husband, Brian, has read it. I’m going to walk through it one day with my children. This is such an important book. 

Hustle Believe Receive by Sarah Centrella

Disclaimer: This book is kind of like Jen Sisero’s book in that there’s cussing. She’s a super chill person, But she’s just kind of her own self, and she drops some f-bombs. So, read it for yourself. Or don’t read it at all if you don’t like that kind of thing. I don’t mind. It doesn’t bother me. So, I will read books like this. I can take the meat right off the bones and it doesn’t bother me.

Also, I would recommend not listening to the audio book—which is what I did. The hashtag is a really big part of this book because the author encourages you to take action and post and tag her and let her know when you’re doing what she’s teaching. So, you’ll hear, “Use hashtag-hustle-believe-receive” or ‘hashtag-dream-it-do-it” a lot. And let me just tell you that you’re going to want to throw your phone into the lake, go get it back out, and set it on fire because you’re going to be so annoyed by the overuse of the word “hashtag” in the audio version of the book. So, read this book in print if you’re going to read it. 

This book is very unique. I have never come across another book that was formatted exactly this way. The author shares her own personal story of how she came home one day to realize that her husband was having an affair and planning on leaving her. So, they split up. She had three kids on her own with no money and no job. She’d been a stay-at-home mom, and now she had nothing.

She had to figure it all out for herself. And she built herself into this incredible entrepreneur, this elite person, who took charge and control of her life and figured this thing out from the ground up. And I really admire her for that. I relate to how she built something from the ground up. Of course, I had my husband, my partner in life, next to me and she didn’t have that so, I really respect that about her.

She’s a very pointed writer. She gets to the point and she will kick you in the pants when you need it. She also interviews like 21 other people who have done the almost impossible and have done it really well with not a lot of money and not a lot of privilege. These are people who have done incredible things and built their lives into something exciting–something they really wanted it to be.

My takeaway from this book is that you can do anything that you set your mind to. It’s a very inspiring book. I really, really enjoyed it. I recommend you read this book if you are working on anything in your life. Getting healthy, overcoming an illness, starting a business, breaking away from an abusive relationship. Whatever it is that’s hard for you, get this book and read it. It’s something you can reference over and over again and just be inspired anytime you need to be. 

OK, so those are the books that I read this year that really impacted me—business and otherwise. I hope this is really helpful for you. 

I hope this gives you a starting point or a jumping off point for finding your next read. I believe that reading is so important and that we all need to do more of it. 

You learn so much from books. So, buy yourself a book (use the affiliate link I provided, please!) and get to reading!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Minimalism & Kids: Let’s Talk About Books & Toy Story

October 2, 2019 by Allie Casazza Leave a Comment

This month is #AllieReadsOctober and we’re talking all month about some of my favorite books. Books that have shaped me, that have influenced my worldview, the way I live, and the way I parent. 

I’m also interviewing a couple authors of books I read this year that impacted me and I think are totally worth a read! Click here to listen to the most recent episodes.

Since my job is to help women declutter their homes and teach their families the importance of living with less, I wanted to be sure to include a few books that can help you mamas raise little minimalists.

As parents, we have this amazing opportunity to shape the next generation. That’s powerful and pretty amazing!

If you ever doubt your purpose, that’s it right there. Or at least part of it 🙂

I say it all the time: I’m raising world-changers. You’re raising world-changers, too. 

Our kids will leave some kind of impression on this planet. So, we have a pretty big responsibility, and studies show it can do only good to raise kids focused on non-material things.

How awesome is it that we have the chance to break the over-consumeristic cycle of our society just by raising content adults? If you’re sitting there like, “Mmmkay, Allie. But how?” 

Let me encourage you to listen to episode 066 of The Purpose Show. I talk all about how to raise minimalist kids and why you should. 


I’m teaming up with a child play therapist to bring you a new FREE web class.

We’ll shine a light on the things you need to know and teach you how to begin the process of minimalism with your kids (or succeed in it if you’ve tried before!). 

LEARN MORE

I believe that raising kids in some version of minimalism is the key to raising grateful, non-entitled, content, self-sufficient, happy adults. And I truly believe that’s what most of us want, am I right? 

These books that I’m including in #AllieReadsOctober are actually children’s books. And they’re really, really good. 

We have these books. I’ve read them to my kids, and I think they do a great job of explaining minimalism to kids in a way they understand.

So, this is a really good way for you to open the door to have a conversation with your kids about minimalism, contentment, generosity, and living simply.  

Side note: there’s a much deeper conversation about resources for helping you raise minimalist kids and all the training you could think of in my course, Uncluttered Kids, which I created with a child play therapist. It’s such a good course and I’m super proud of it! I know it can help you. Check it out!

[***I want to make sure I put a little disclaimer right here: The first two books that I mention are a part of the Berenstain Bears series. And I just found out that this series is Christian-based. I had no idea. I grew up reading these books and I don’t remember any Biblical references or anything about the Bible. So, I think this series of books is safe if you’re not of faith, or if you’re not of the same faith as me. That being said, the first book I mention definitely has Biblical references (that’s what had me Googling the rest of the series to find out if the whole thing is Christian). The book mentions that Mama Bear pulls out a storybook Bible and shows her kids the story of a king. That’s it. But I just want to always be sure to let you know if something is more geared toward the Christian faith because I know that not everyone is of the same faith as me, or of any faith at all.***]  

The Berenstain Bears and the Trouble with Things by Jan Berenstain & Mike Berenstain

This book really does a great job of drawing attention to our culture’s obsession with things. The plot shows a typical day in the life of a typical family. 

Mama Bear sees an actual need that the family has (they need new sheets and pillowcases) and announces that she’s going to the mall. But, of course, the minute that she announces it, suddenly everybody wants to go because they all magically “need” something. (How accurate is that?)

But Mama Bear isn’t really feeling everybody going to the mall, she doesn’t think any of them need anything else. Nevertheless, they all pile into the car for a trip to the mall. 

The book highlights how crowded the mall was and how much effort it took to actually get there. Once they’re inside there’s a huge crowd. Everyone’ s busily shopping for things that they probably don’t need. 

The first thing they do is get the things that Mama Bear came for—you know, the things they actually need. But then Papa Bear wants to go to the fishing store and the kids want to go to the toy store. 

So, Papa Bear buys a new fishing reel (that he doesn’t need), and the kids walk into the toy store and immediately start asking for all these new toys (that they don’t need either). And Mama and Papa Bear are pissed, basically. 

Papa Bear says, “I’m so shocked by how greedy you are!” Meanwhile Mama Bear is whispering in his year like, “Hmmmaybe we shouldn’t be so shocked because we’re the ones who gave them all their things in the first place. Oh, and also you just got a new fishing reel you for sure didn’t need.” (I’m paraphrasing)

And so, basically, they go to the book store, they get the Bible out and Mama Bear shows the cubs the story of the king with all the riches, the golden crown, and all the robes and how he wasn’t really satisfied by any of those things. 

Papa Bear tells them that nothing that the king can buy with all his money is as beautiful as the simple beauty that God created in the world. And the Bernstein Bears realize the beauty in simple things and in having less. 

They decide to make a commitment together to just enjoy nature more, to get outside more, to enjoy each other more, and to not put so much importance on things. 

What I like love about this book: It emphasizes that family is really important and that things are not so important.  👏👏👏

The Berenstain Bears Think of Those in Need by Stan Berenstain & Jan Berenstain

In this book, Mama Bear is taking care of the house and she notices that their house is just really full of a lot of stuff. She’s always cleaning and it’s taking her way too long to maintain and manage all of it.  

There’s crap everywhere (it doesn’t say crap in the book, but you know it is). In the attic, in the closets, in the drawers. 

Basically, Mama Bear is standing there thinking that they have so much stuff while others have so little. 

This bothers Mama Bear a lot. She goes to sleep worried about this and ends up having a nightmare. She dreams all their stuff comes to life and is pouring out of every drawer, closet, nook and cranny and just chanting at her, “Too much! Too much! Too much!.” 

She wakes up in a cold sweat and tells her hubby, “We have to do something about all this stuff.” The next morning she makes a family announcement that they have too much stuff and they’re going to get rid of a bunch of it. 

After some back and forth, they decide to have a yard sale. But once they see how much stuff they have that they don’t even need, they decide to give it away instead.

They donate to the old folks’ home, the hospital, the veterans who are out of work—basically people who need it more than they do. And they learn some valuable lessons along the way. 

What I like about this book: It shows that many of us have the good life. And it focuses on the common problem of too much stuff, and how difficult and time-consuming it is to maintain all of it.

What I didn’t like about this book: The traditional gender roles. Mama Bear is taking care of everything in the house and Papa Bear’s just coming home from work, trying to relax. The only way he notices that his house is filled with crap is when he tries to sit down and there’s just stuff in his way. So, that kind of sucks. It would’ve been better if Papa Bear was also helping clean. But, ya know, we can’t win ‘em all. 

If I was going to get just one of the Bernstein Bears books for my kids, I would get this one over the Trouble with Things.

Robbie’s Toys—A Boy With Too Many Toys by The Go 2 Girls LA

This book is about a little boy named Robbie who has too many toys. Obviously. 

And the more toys he gets, the bigger his mess gets until his mess has grown so big that he can’t even play with the toys he has. Sound familiar? 

It’s just too much. So, his mom tells him that it’s time to donate some toys to other kids who don’t have as much as he does. 

He decides to only keep the toys that make him really, really happy. And now he has more room and he organizes the things he kept into bins so that he can actually find what is special to him and so it’s easy to clean up.  

What I like about this book: It’s really good for super, super little kids. I would say definitely no older than five years old. 

My son, Emmett, is four right now and if he was turning six, or even 5 and ⅓, I would not read him this book. Because he would laugh and think it was a joke. 

But it’s a really great book to start a conversation with your really young child about the fact that he has too many toys (which is totally normal). It rhymes, and it normalizes the typical decluttering process. 

I also think this book could present you with the opportunity to hear your kids’ concerns before purging. This would open up the door to say, “So, we’re going to do this just like Robbie did! But before we start, do you have anything that you’re worried about? Are there any toys that you’re worried about losing or that you don’t want to get rid of?” 

I say this all the time, and I’ll say again here, I think it’s super, super important to involve your kids in the decluttering process. Don’t do this without them or just go in while they’re sleeping or at school and just get rid of their stuff (unless they’re younger than like 3). 

You wouldn’t want someone to do that to your stuff, so don’t do that to them. We don’t want our kids to feel betrayed. 

We want them on board with decluttering and minimalism. And that will be really, really hard to do if they don’t trust you.

OK. Now, let’s talk about a non-book issue that ties in here… the Toy Story movies. 

I get asked about these movies all. the. time. 

A lot of moms who are in the process of decluttering or are about to start decluttering have concerns about showing their kids these movies because they give toys life. And it just seems really dangerous to show kids these movies and then try to get them to give their toys away. 

I’ve never really spoken on this topic because I’ve just thought it needs to be the parent’s judgment. But now, Toy Story 4 has come out.

Since I get asked pretty regularly about these movies, I just want to give you a little bit of info on what the movie is about so you can make an informed decision if you haven’t seen it. The makers of Toy Story 4 really laid in heavy on the sadness of getting rid of toys, even more so than the other three.

In the beginning of the movie, there’s a throwback scene to when Andy was a child. Andy’s mom is decluttering (way to go, mom!) and gets rid of Bo Peep. 

And there is this really sad separation scene between Woody and Bo Peep. And honestly, it’s friggin’ heartbreaking. 

Like even for me, as a mom, watching it was like, “Oh my gah. This is so sad.” So, I can absolutely understand why some moms have said to me, “I wish I hadn’t taken my kids to see this movie. We’re about to get into decluttering and I’m learning how to purge and I want to do this with my kids but now they’re all freaked out and they think they’re toys have life. Sooo, this sucks.” 

Yep. Totally get it. 

That being said, we love the Toy Story movies. We’ve seen them all. We own the first three and watch them regularly and, actually, they’re my kids’ go-to choice when I say “pick a movie!”

My kids also have most of the toy characters. Toy Story is a big part of our life. It’s special!

And it’s been fine because I’ve raised my kids in minimalism. My oldest, Bella, was 3 when I did my first purge (she’s 10 now) and Hudson was an infant. Emmett wasn’t even born yet. 

This lifestyle is all they’ve ever known. They understand what should stay and what shouldn’t. And they have a say in what stays and what goes. So, that’s an advantage for sure. 

But I wanted you to know that Toy Story hasn’t had a negative impact on them, our minimalist lifestyle or our seasonal toy purges. 

Having said that, because I’m super minimal everywhere else, I don’t really care if their toys are the most minimal ever. It’s just not my goal, so if Toy Story bothered them, I would probably be gracious and relaxed about it (kinda like I am with birthday parties and the influx of toys then).

Minimalism is something that’s regular for us, so it’s regular to them. It’s normal. 

They will come to me and tell me if they decide they don’t want to play with something anymore and they’ll donate it. I don’t have to force or even prompt them. This is how we live. 

We live and breathe this way. It’s a part of our family culture, and so it’s not a big deal. And Toy Story has always been a part of their childhood, in the midst of minimalism. 

But, if you’re new to this and you’re about to purge for the first time, Toy Story 4 could be confusing and totally mess with your kids. So, maybe don’t show them right now. It’s your call, and I wanted to shine a light on what I think, how we live, and what about the new Toy Story movie might make it hard for your littles. 

Maybe save it for another time after this lifestyle switch is old news and they’re feeling a little more grounded in it. 

At the end of the day, you know your kids better than anyone else. So, I just encourage you to be confident in your motherhood, and use your best judgement. You got this!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Minimalism & Kids: Let’s Talk About Books & Toy Story

October 2, 2019 by alliecasazza Leave a Comment

This month is #AllieReadsOctober and we’re talking all month about some of my favorite books. Books that have shaped me, that have influenced my worldview, the way I live, and the way I parent. 

I’m also interviewing a couple authors of books I read this year that impacted me and I think are totally worth a read! Click here to listen to the most recent episodes.

Since my job is to help women declutter their homes and teach their families the importance of living with less, I wanted to be sure to include a few books that can help you mamas raise little minimalists.

As parents, we have this amazing opportunity to shape the next generation. That’s powerful and pretty amazing!

If you ever doubt your purpose, that’s it right there. Or at least part of it 🙂

I say it all the time: I’m raising world-changers. You’re raising world-changers, too. 

Our kids will leave some kind of impression on this planet. So, we have a pretty big responsibility, and studies show it can do only good to raise kids focused on non-material things.

How awesome is it that we have the chance to break the over-consumeristic cycle of our society just by raising content adults? If you’re sitting there like, “Mmmkay, Allie. But how?” 

Let me encourage you to listen to episode 066 of The Purpose Show. I talk all about how to raise minimalist kids and why you should. 


I’m teaming up with a child play therapist to bring you a new FREE web class.

We’ll shine a light on the things you need to know and teach you how to begin the process of minimalism with your kids (or succeed in it if you’ve tried before!). 

LEARN MORE

I believe that raising kids in some version of minimalism is the key to raising grateful, non-entitled, content, self-sufficient, happy adults. And I truly believe that’s what most of us want, am I right? 

These books that I’m including in #AllieReadsOctober are actually children’s books. And they’re really, really good. 

We have these books. I’ve read them to my kids, and I think they do a great job of explaining minimalism to kids in a way they understand.

So, this is a really good way for you to open the door to have a conversation with your kids about minimalism, contentment, generosity, and living simply.  

Side note: there’s a much deeper conversation about resources for helping you raise minimalist kids and all the training you could think of in my course, Uncluttered Kids, which I created with a child play therapist. It’s such a good course and I’m super proud of it! I know it can help you. Check it out!

[***I want to make sure I put a little disclaimer right here: The first two books that I mention are a part of the Berenstain Bears series. And I just found out that this series is Christian-based. I had no idea. I grew up reading these books and I don’t remember any Biblical references or anything about the Bible. So, I think this series of books is safe if you’re not of faith, or if you’re not of the same faith as me. That being said, the first book I mention definitely has Biblical references (that’s what had me Googling the rest of the series to find out if the whole thing is Christian). The book mentions that Mama Bear pulls out a storybook Bible and shows her kids the story of a king. That’s it. But I just want to always be sure to let you know if something is more geared toward the Christian faith because I know that not everyone is of the same faith as me, or of any faith at all.***]  

The Berenstain Bears and the Trouble with Things by Jan Berenstain & Mike Berenstain

This book really does a great job of drawing attention to our culture’s obsession with things. The plot shows a typical day in the life of a typical family. 

Mama Bear sees an actual need that the family has (they need new sheets and pillowcases) and announces that she’s going to the mall. But, of course, the minute that she announces it, suddenly everybody wants to go because they all magically “need” something. (How accurate is that?)

But Mama Bear isn’t really feeling everybody going to the mall, she doesn’t think any of them need anything else. Nevertheless, they all pile into the car for a trip to the mall. 

The book highlights how crowded the mall was and how much effort it took to actually get there. Once they’re inside there’s a huge crowd. Everyone’ s busily shopping for things that they probably don’t need. 

The first thing they do is get the things that Mama Bear came for—you know, the things they actually need. But then Papa Bear wants to go to the fishing store and the kids want to go to the toy store. 

So, Papa Bear buys a new fishing reel (that he doesn’t need), and the kids walk into the toy store and immediately start asking for all these new toys (that they don’t need either). And Mama and Papa Bear are pissed, basically. 

Papa Bear says, “I’m so shocked by how greedy you are!” Meanwhile Mama Bear is whispering in his year like, “Hmmmaybe we shouldn’t be so shocked because we’re the ones who gave them all their things in the first place. Oh, and also you just got a new fishing reel you for sure didn’t need.” (I’m paraphrasing)

And so, basically, they go to the book store, they get the Bible out and Mama Bear shows the cubs the story of the king with all the riches, the golden crown, and all the robes and how he wasn’t really satisfied by any of those things. 

Papa Bear tells them that nothing that the king can buy with all his money is as beautiful as the simple beauty that God created in the world. And the Bernstein Bears realize the beauty in simple things and in having less. 

They decide to make a commitment together to just enjoy nature more, to get outside more, to enjoy each other more, and to not put so much importance on things. 

What I like love about this book: It emphasizes that family is really important and that things are not so important.  👏👏👏

The Berenstain Bears Think of Those in Need by Stan Berenstain & Jan Berenstain

In this book, Mama Bear is taking care of the house and she notices that their house is just really full of a lot of stuff. She’s always cleaning and it’s taking her way too long to maintain and manage all of it.  

There’s crap everywhere (it doesn’t say crap in the book, but you know it is). In the attic, in the closets, in the drawers. 

Basically, Mama Bear is standing there thinking that they have so much stuff while others have so little. 

This bothers Mama Bear a lot. She goes to sleep worried about this and ends up having a nightmare. She dreams all their stuff comes to life and is pouring out of every drawer, closet, nook and cranny and just chanting at her, “Too much! Too much! Too much!.” 

She wakes up in a cold sweat and tells her hubby, “We have to do something about all this stuff.” The next morning she makes a family announcement that they have too much stuff and they’re going to get rid of a bunch of it. 

After some back and forth, they decide to have a yard sale. But once they see how much stuff they have that they don’t even need, they decide to give it away instead.

They donate to the old folks’ home, the hospital, the veterans who are out of work—basically people who need it more than they do. And they learn some valuable lessons along the way. 

What I like about this book: It shows that many of us have the good life. And it focuses on the common problem of too much stuff, and how difficult and time-consuming it is to maintain all of it.

What I didn’t like about this book: The traditional gender roles. Mama Bear is taking care of everything in the house and Papa Bear’s just coming home from work, trying to relax. The only way he notices that his house is filled with crap is when he tries to sit down and there’s just stuff in his way. So, that kind of sucks. It would’ve been better if Papa Bear was also helping clean. But, ya know, we can’t win ‘em all. 

If I was going to get just one of the Bernstein Bears books for my kids, I would get this one over the Trouble with Things.

Robbie’s Toys—A Boy With Too Many Toys by The Go 2 Girls LA

This book is about a little boy named Robbie who has too many toys. Obviously. 

And the more toys he gets, the bigger his mess gets until his mess has grown so big that he can’t even play with the toys he has. Sound familiar? 

It’s just too much. So, his mom tells him that it’s time to donate some toys to other kids who don’t have as much as he does. 

He decides to only keep the toys that make him really, really happy. And now he has more room and he organizes the things he kept into bins so that he can actually find what is special to him and so it’s easy to clean up.  

What I like about this book: It’s really good for super, super little kids. I would say definitely no older than five years old. 

My son, Emmett, is four right now and if he was turning six, or even 5 and ⅓, I would not read him this book. Because he would laugh and think it was a joke. 

But it’s a really great book to start a conversation with your really young child about the fact that he has too many toys (which is totally normal). It rhymes, and it normalizes the typical decluttering process. 

I also think this book could present you with the opportunity to hear your kids’ concerns before purging. This would open up the door to say, “So, we’re going to do this just like Robbie did! But before we start, do you have anything that you’re worried about? Are there any toys that you’re worried about losing or that you don’t want to get rid of?” 

I say this all the time, and I’ll say again here, I think it’s super, super important to involve your kids in the decluttering process. Don’t do this without them or just go in while they’re sleeping or at school and just get rid of their stuff (unless they’re younger than like 3). 

You wouldn’t want someone to do that to your stuff, so don’t do that to them. We don’t want our kids to feel betrayed. 

We want them on board with decluttering and minimalism. And that will be really, really hard to do if they don’t trust you.

OK. Now, let’s talk about a non-book issue that ties in here… the Toy Story movies. 

I get asked about these movies all. the. time. 

A lot of moms who are in the process of decluttering or are about to start decluttering have concerns about showing their kids these movies because they give toys life. And it just seems really dangerous to show kids these movies and then try to get them to give their toys away. 

I’ve never really spoken on this topic because I’ve just thought it needs to be the parent’s judgment. But now, Toy Story 4 has come out.

Since I get asked pretty regularly about these movies, I just want to give you a little bit of info on what the movie is about so you can make an informed decision if you haven’t seen it. The makers of Toy Story 4 really laid in heavy on the sadness of getting rid of toys, even more so than the other three.

In the beginning of the movie, there’s a throwback scene to when Andy was a child. Andy’s mom is decluttering (way to go, mom!) and gets rid of Bo Peep. 

And there is this really sad separation scene between Woody and Bo Peep. And honestly, it’s friggin’ heartbreaking. 

Like even for me, as a mom, watching it was like, “Oh my gah. This is so sad.” So, I can absolutely understand why some moms have said to me, “I wish I hadn’t taken my kids to see this movie. We’re about to get into decluttering and I’m learning how to purge and I want to do this with my kids but now they’re all freaked out and they think they’re toys have life. Sooo, this sucks.” 

Yep. Totally get it. 

That being said, we love the Toy Story movies. We’ve seen them all. We own the first three and watch them regularly and, actually, they’re my kids’ go-to choice when I say “pick a movie!”

My kids also have most of the toy characters. Toy Story is a big part of our life. It’s special!

And it’s been fine because I’ve raised my kids in minimalism. My oldest, Bella, was 3 when I did my first purge (she’s 10 now) and Hudson was an infant. Emmett wasn’t even born yet. 

This lifestyle is all they’ve ever known. They understand what should stay and what shouldn’t. And they have a say in what stays and what goes. So, that’s an advantage for sure. 

But I wanted you to know that Toy Story hasn’t had a negative impact on them, our minimalist lifestyle or our seasonal toy purges. 

Having said that, because I’m super minimal everywhere else, I don’t really care if their toys are the most minimal ever. It’s just not my goal, so if Toy Story bothered them, I would probably be gracious and relaxed about it (kinda like I am with birthday parties and the influx of toys then).

Minimalism is something that’s regular for us, so it’s regular to them. It’s normal. 

They will come to me and tell me if they decide they don’t want to play with something anymore and they’ll donate it. I don’t have to force or even prompt them. This is how we live. 

We live and breathe this way. It’s a part of our family culture, and so it’s not a big deal. And Toy Story has always been a part of their childhood, in the midst of minimalism. 

But, if you’re new to this and you’re about to purge for the first time, Toy Story 4 could be confusing and totally mess with your kids. So, maybe don’t show them right now. It’s your call, and I wanted to shine a light on what I think, how we live, and what about the new Toy Story movie might make it hard for your littles. 

Maybe save it for another time after this lifestyle switch is old news and they’re feeling a little more grounded in it. 

At the end of the day, you know your kids better than anyone else. So, I just encourage you to be confident in your motherhood, and use your best judgement. You got this!

Filed Under: Uncategorized

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