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Transcript Episode 388: Feminism Isn’t Doing Everything Yourself

October 2, 2024

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I'm an NLP, EFT and mindset certified coach, top podcaster and bestselling author. I'm here to help women transform their lives into their desired reality through self-concept work & neural energetic wiring.

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What is up, beautiful? Welcome back to the Purpose Show podcast. Let’s chat about feminine energy today. This has been on my mind a lot lately. And I think it’s just mostly because it’s been in my DMs a lot. I just feel like feminine energy, and it’s such a hot topic. And it’s just discussed a lot, but not always. in detail. And the other thing I want to talk about is feminism and as it relates to feminine energy and just some things that have been on my mind. This is very much an opinion episode, but let’s get into it. So I have kind of a personal anecdote that I want to start this out with, and I don’t want to name any names, but there is someone in my life that Anytime I share a desire that I have in terms of having something done for me, or, oh, I would really like to go and do for my man to take me on this trip, or, oh, I was thinking about doing this and having this done for me, this person consistently says, you can just do it yourself. You’re a bad bitch. You can take care of yourself. You can do that yourself. Why don’t you just take yourself on the trip? Why don’t you just do this yourself? Don’t ask them. Just do this. Don’t hire that out. Just save the money and do it yourself. Feminism, feminism. And this person always makes the strong arm motion with her arm. And it’s just like, OK. When this happens, it usually causes me to feel like, first of all, just dismissed, which is fine. I can control my own feelings. But there’s a bigger underlying message here that I see mirrored in society and in the messaging toward women. And really, in my opinion, I have seen the patriarchy see feminism and its uprising, and then use it against women. So using feminism itself against the very people that it is here to serve and support and help and uplift. And so I just want to talk about this and kind of get into it a little bit deeper than this. But it is OK to want help, to desire a partner to do things for you. to not do everything yourself. Feminism is not doing everything yourself. In fact, I would argue that there’s a lot of layers to feminism and feminine energy that is quite the opposite. So a lot of people misunderstand feminism, men and women. They misunderstand it as, like I said, having to do everything on your own or really like rejecting help, especially from men. Brian and I were having a conversation recently where he was sharing with me that there’s been a couple times where he’ll be going in or out of somewhere, and he’ll just hold the door open, like he would for anyone, male or female. And it’s a woman, and they’ve said things like, I can get my own door. And they get upset. And everyone has a story. Everyone has somewhere they’re coming from. But this is kind of what I’m talking about, just this misunderstanding that it’s like you’re literally rejecting help, you’re literally rejecting support from anyone, especially from men. And true feminism, like the definition of feminism is really just equality, the equal treatment. women. You know, considering how men are treated. Equal opportunity, right? But feminine energy is so beautiful and so goddess-like and it is not this like pushing, forcing, doing everything yourself. That’s actually really masculine energy. And true feminism, I think, is really about honoring yourself, treating yourself with respect, and and holding other people up to the standard of treating women with equality in all areas of life, equality not pushing in force. You can be a strong, independent woman and still desire support or acts of service from men, from the world, from a partner. It does not diminish your power. It actually enhances it when it’s done in balance. The pressure to always, like, take yourself on the trip, do it yourself, or handle everything alone. I can just do it myself. Anything you can do, I can do better. It just leads to burnout and disconnection from your feminine energy. And that is what I mean when I say that I see the patriarchy using feminism to harm women, the very thing that’s meant to support us and bring us into equal partnership and equal balance with men and the masculine is they’re burning us out. They’re causing a disconnection. They’re causing a rift between us and our feminine energy. And so let’s reframe the narrative here. Accepting help or wanting someone else to do things for you does not make you weak. It’s part of allowing your feminine side to flourish because the masculine allows the feminine to really bloom and shine and do well and be healthy. They go together. And I’ve talked about this before, but it bears repeating here. Masculine and feminine energy actually has nothing to do with gender. Every being has a masculine and feminine energy, and both exist regardless of your gender. And the key is learning how to balance them. So masculine energy is about action, structure, logic, providing. Feminine energy is about intuition, creativity, and being in flow. It’s about getting inspired and feeling into yourself, God, your higher power, whatever. We all need both energies in different situations in order to thrive. It’s about balance, not dominance of one over the other. And again, the masculine energy, whether it’s in a hetero romantic relationship or just you in yourself having the balance of masculine and feminine, the masculine energy allows the feminine to shine. So when you allow yourself to be in a place of logic and to be pushing and thinking through something and and providing structure and routine for yourself, and taking action on things, you’re allowing the feminine energy in you to shine, that you’re taking action on the intuition, the flow, the creativity that the feminine energy provided, and now you can go take action on it and live a good life. And when you allow someone else, who’s often, you know, for this example, in a masculine energy role, To step in and take charge, it gives you space to rest and lean into your intuition and lean into your feminine energy. So for example, in relationships, when the masculine energy is grounded and providing and stable and strong and safe, the feminine feels safe and can flow and nurture and create and be inspired. And it’s a beautiful balance. So that’s in relationships. And it’s really the same thing in yourself with that balance of your masculine and feminine energy that you hold inside of you. Masculine energy creates the container that allows feminine energy to be free and express itself fully. feminine energy flourishes when it is given space to rest and recharge. So the constant doing without any moments of stillness is, like I said before, disconnecting you from your feminine energy. So when we embrace rest as an important part of our well-being and we give ourselves permission to take breaks, step back, let others provide certain things that we need, support us when we need it, plan things, take things off of our plate, we are embracing our feminine energy and we are really able to thrive. There is so much strength in surrendering to support, whether it’s letting a partner take the lead or giving yourself permission to rest. It is one of the most powerful ways to reconnect with your feminine energy. So ask for help. Let someone take care of you. It is not a weakness, but rather a strength. that is really getting you to align with honoring yourself, respecting yourself, loving and adoring yourself, and aligning with your feminine energy, which is so healing as women. You deserve to receive. You are worthy of receiving. And it is a beautiful feminine energy act and a gift and a blessing to receive, whether it’s help, love, receiving acts of service, receiving space to rest, receiving somebody taking something off your plate. Feminine energy thrives on connection and nurturing. So allow others to pour into you. Speak up and say what you need and receive that being given to you. It is not selfish to expect or desire acts of service or care from others. It is actually a super essential part of having a healthy relationship and for your personal well-being. So feminism has nothing to do with doing everything yourself, OK? I want to encourage you to think about where you might be overextending in masculine energy by doing too much and not allowing yourself to receive support or judging yourself for wanting it. Identify an area of your life where you think you can ask for more help or rest more often. That is the beauty of the feminine energy. That is what you get to experience. That is what you deserve. And you get to be balanced. You’re going to be so much happier when you are in that balance.

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