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It’s one of the questions I get asked among all the other common ones…
“How far apart are they?”
“You sure have your hands full, don’t you?”
“Do you stay home or work?”
And when my answer to that last one comes with a smile and personal pride, “I stay home with them”, I get the same response nearly every time.
“You are so lucky.”
It’s not that this response bothers me necessarily, but there’s something about it that just doesn’t sit right with me.
Why lucky? I’m not one of those people that’s adamant about people using the word blessed instead… it isn’t that. I thought about this a lot the other day as I drove home from a kid’s birthday party where the above conversation had taken place yet again. Am I lucky to stay home with my children?
I am not lucky at all. Five years ago, my husband and I sat down and made a choice after I heard from God Himself the call to be home. I tucked away my fresh real estate license and pencil skirts and traded them in for sweat pants and Veggietales.
Staying home was a choice we made, and it comes with sacrifices not everyone is willing to make.
We are following a leading of the Holy Spirit- a calling on our lives and the lives of our children- to live this one life I get at home with them- being there for every step, breath, boo boo, and giggle.
Sometimes there are just a few dollars in the bank, seriously. That’s because of a choice we felt led to make, and it’s a big leap of faith and a sacrifice. It means we are saying “no” to credit cards and debt, “no” to more money and better things and worldly stability. It means we are saying “yes” to a one-income lifestyle so that our children will always remember their mom being there for every little thing, having no work to take up any of her days. It means less of everything material in exchange for more of everything emotional and spiritual. It means making difficult decisions based around a small budget and doing what is best for our family- which is for me to be at home with our kids.
I know people mean well and aren’t thinking their comments all the way through, and I mean no rudeness to them, but I am not lucky to stay home. I am a Spirit-led parent who made a hard choice, and continues to make that hard choice every week when there is less where there could be more. But you know… the exchange is a pretty sweet deal- less in my wallet than others but a thousand times more tiny moments and memories in my heart.