2) They have aerial vision and logic in a crisis.
A few weeks ago I had a meltdown. It seemed there was always a big mess to clean up somewhere in the house and nothing was flowing. I felt like I had no help at all, and I couldn’t keep up with anything,
plus
I had just added in working several hours a day on growing my blog into a second income, and had no balance. My meltdown occurred near the end of the day right when Brian walked through the door. He stood in the living room just listening to my rant, and after it was done, he was quiet. A few minutes later he called the kids downstairs and gave them a talk about chores.
After about ten minutes he had them cleaning the whole upstairs
and
he’d set up a daily list for them to accomplish before they even come down for breakfast in the mornings. They have actually done what he said most mornings since that day. Why? Because when Brian speaks to the kids about something, it’s serious and he means business; they know that. Also because I am always talking to them and I admit, lecturing them, so when Dad says something it sounds new, and tends to stick.
Brian comes into a crisis like a helicopter, with a bird’s eye view, scans the situation with his logic and can come up with a practical and effective solution, all while remaining totally calm while I’m a tired basket case. I need that, because sometimes I’m so caught up in the chaos that I can’t see the obvious solution.
3) They don’t “lose it” like we do.
This one sort of goes with number two, and it’s probably specific to men like my husband rather than all men, but so worth mentioning. I am temperamental and that is my biggest issue- anger. I can take so much and then I fly off the handle and just lose it. Brian really doesn’t do this. He is calm, collected, and reasonable basically all the time. He’s my Mr. Steady and I am
so thankful
my kids have him as the other parent for some balance to my crazy.
5) They show their kids that they love their mom.
Again, I know not all husbands are like mine, but this is a big one. Brian loves physical touch and he’s very affectionate; I am naturally the opposite in both ways. At the end of the day, the last thing I’m thinking about is showing our kids how much we love each other [something that kids desperately need to see], but Brian takes care of that for me. He is always running his fingers through my hair, looking into my eyes, rubbing my back, reaching for my hand, kissing me, or gesturing for me to snuggle into him on the couch. The kids see that, and I love it. They are seeing what a good man looks like.