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Self Development Plan

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Hey loves! Today, we’re diving into a super important topic that I know many of you will resonate with—reconnecting with yourself. If you’ve been feeling lost, disconnected, or just not sure what’s next in your life, this post is for you. We’re going to explore how to pursue yourself, reclaim your power, and realign with your true purpose.

Understanding the Core Issue: Why You Feel Disconnected

First, let’s talk about why you might be feeling this way. It’s so common for women to feel disconnected from themselves, especially if you’ve been caught up in the whirlwind of motherhood, career demands, or just the daily grind. You might feel like you’ve lost touch with who you are outside of your roles and responsibilities. It’s okay, and you’re not alone. This feeling often comes with guilt, especially if you have a life that others might envy. But your feelings are valid, and they’re here to guide you.

Emotions as Allies: Your emotions are not something to fear or push away. They’re here to guide you. When you feel unfulfilled or disconnected, it’s a sign that something needs to shift. Emotions are meant to move us forward. They’re your internal GPS, helping you navigate toward a more aligned and fulfilling life.

The Impact of Societal Expectations and Identity Shifts

Many women lose themselves due to societal pressures and identity shifts. The pressure to “do it all” can lead to burnout and self-neglect. We’re often taught to put everyone else first—our kids, our partners, our jobs. And while being a caregiver is a beautiful role, it’s crucial not to lose yourself in the process.

Identity Shifts: Motherhood is one of the most common identity shifts that can lead to feeling lost. Whether you’re a new mom or transitioning into a new phase of motherhood, it’s easy to feel like you don’t recognize yourself anymore. The constant demands on your time and energy can leave little room for self-care and personal growth.

How to Reconnect with Yourself: Practical Steps

1. Create Space and Opportunity for Self-Connection

• Communicate Your Needs: If you have a partner or support system, communicate your need for personal time clearly and assertively. Remember, you’re not asking for permission—you’re stating what you need to thrive.
• Non-Negotiable Self-Time: Dedicate time each week to yourself. This could be a solo date, a long walk, or even just an hour of uninterrupted time to read or journal. The key is to make this time a priority.

2. Spend Time Alone Without Distractions

• Solo Dates: Take yourself out to dinner, a coffee shop, or even for a drive. Turn off your phone and just be with yourself. This practice helps you reconnect with who you are outside of your roles and responsibilities.
• Mindful Activities: Engage in activities that allow you to be present with yourself. Cooking, cleaning, or even coloring can become acts of self-connection when done mindfully.

3. Break Free from People-Pleasing

• Set Boundaries: Start by saying no to things that drain your energy. If you’re used to people-pleasing, this can be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary for reclaiming your power.
• EFT for Saying No: If you struggle with setting boundaries, try using Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to clear the anxiety around saying no. I have a free EFT video on my TPS Links page to help you with this.

4. Rebuild the Relationship with Yourself

• Daily Check-Ins: Spend a few minutes each day checking in with yourself. Ask, “How am I feeling today?” and “What do I need right now?” This simple practice can help you tune into your inner guidance and reconnect with your needs and desires.
• Journaling Prompts: Use journaling as a tool to explore your feelings and reconnect with yourself. Some prompts to get started:
  • What does my ideal day look like?
  • What brings me joy and fulfillment?
  • How can I show myself love and compassion today?

5. Pursue Personal Desires and Goals

• Honor Your Desires: Whether it’s starting a new hobby, taking a course, or launching a business, honor what lights you up. Pursuing personal goals is a powerful way to reconnect with yourself and reignite your passion for life.
• Take Small Steps: Start small and build from there. It’s not about achieving everything overnight but about making consistent progress toward what matters to you.

Overcoming Common Obstacles

Dealing with Guilt and Self-Doubt

It’s normal to feel guilty when you start prioritizing yourself, especially if you’ve been conditioned to put others first. Remember, self-care is not selfish—it’s essential. When you take care of yourself, you’re better equipped to care for others.

Handling Resistance from Others

When you start setting boundaries and prioritizing yourself, others may push back. Stay firm in your decisions and remember why you’re doing this. You’re not responsible for other people’s reactions—you’re responsible for your own well-being.

Final Thoughts: You Are Worth Pursuing

Reconnecting with yourself is an ongoing journey, not a one-time event. It requires patience, compassion, and a commitment to putting yourself first. You are worth pursuing. You are worth the time and effort it takes to get to know yourself again.

If you’re ready to dive deeper, I have a self-development plan available for free on my TPS Links page. It’s a step-by-step guide to help you reconnect with yourself and create a life that feels true to who you are.

You’ve got this, love. Keep showing up for yourself.