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Transcript BE Episode 3: Why My Business Was Stuck and How I’m Moving Forward

September 26, 2024

I'm allie.

I'm an NLP, EFT and mindset certified coach, top podcaster and bestselling author. I'm here to help women transform their lives into their desired reality through self-concept work & neural energetic wiring.

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Hello, my friends. Welcome back to the Business Energetics Podcast. I’ve got a real raw episode for you today because I recently had one of those like just tough, shitty gut punch realizations that forced me to just take a harder look at what I’m doing both, I mean, really in my business, like we’re going to focus on that angle of it today. And I’m just going to get super honest with you as always. And I think like, I think that’s important for me to do because a lot of us are going through things that we don’t always talk about, or we have this perception that like people that we admire and follow online are like, they’ve got it all together. They’re doing everything so well. They’re so consistent, but behind the scenes, like it’s kind of a shit show. So, um, for me, like this episode is about that feeling that like, When you’re working and working, but things are just not clicking and results are not there. And you’re just like, what the, like, what am I doing wrong? Um, that’s where I was for like. A while. Um, and so if you’re feeling that too, like there’s just a realization that I have that I want to share with you in case it really supports you, but you’re the one that this episode is for, if that resonates. So here’s what happened. I was sitting there a few months ago, a couple months ago actually, and I’m in a coaching program right now, a certification program. for like five different certifications at once. And it’s, it’s so much work, but it’s lighting me up. It’s been so good. And in our program, we were practicing on each other. So I was the coach for one of my fellow students, and then she was the coach for me. And they have you like, bring up a problem that you’re facing, like nothing too, you know, really deep or traumatic or anything, but just like a frustration that you have in your life. And so I brought up I’m really frustrated with the algorithm and Instagram and the results I’m not seeing in my business and all these things. And my fellow student who was acting as my coach kind of just walked me through like some questions and to get to the root of what was going on. Basically, I realized like I’m getting this is why like you cannot coach yourself. I actually in this certification program, we learned and saw proof that you literally cannot coach yourself out of your own stuff. We are meant to rely on and help each other. And so I’m sitting there in this call like, Holy shit. Like I had this realization, I’m sitting there frustrated, talking about the numbers, talking about the engagement problems, the results or lack thereof. And it hit me. I am saying all these things and saying all these complaints, but like, I just totally started dropping what I know. to be consistent in what I know works and what I coach my clients in. I wasn’t seeing the results I want because I wasn’t showing up the way I really need to. I just kind of got complacent. You know, I have, you know, a large following and I’m not really much of a numbers person. I could give a shit and I’ve always been more focused on growing my email list than social media, but social media is important and it’s kind of like the front gates that get everyone comes through to get into your email list to get into the behind the scenes of your business, right? And so I just kind of got complacent with it and was like, Oh, it’s fine. And just was like kind of coasting and cruising. And then when my, my fellow student acting as my coach was like, okay, well, like, why, why have you been doing that? Like, what specifically have you been doing or not doing that is like coasting or cruising? And I would basically like, I’ll spare you all the 45 minutes of coaching details, but Basically it came down to, and this is the thing with coaching, like it’s never about the symptom. That’s never about the issue that you bring to the conversation. There’s always a deeper issue. The problem you bring to a coaching call is always just a symptom of like the actual root problem. So for me, we boil down to it. And this like surface problem of like, I’m frustrated with the algorithm, frustrated with Instagram. I’m frustrated with the results I’m not seeing was actually. Another layer, still another fricking layer. of I’m being seriously inconsistent because I was still feeling like I’m not owning who I really am and not showing up the way I need to because I’m afraid of being seen. And I have so much like trauma and memories of when showing up didn’t feel safe. And I was also like feeling embarrassed to admit that this is what I was doing because I talk about showing up and being present and doing the work. But in this small area of my life and my business, like I wasn’t living it. I was just half assing things and it was showing the results were small because I was giving small. And then the root reason of that was the fear of being seen. So This was like, it might not sound like it, but for me, this was a light bulb moment because I truly had no conscious idea that I was in this pattern, that I had fallen, like just let everything go to the wayside and was treating my business this way. So I’ve talked a lot on The Purpose Show about, you know, learning to really love myself, owning myself, taking up space, not shrinking myself to fit into a box, all these things. But that’s the thing with like big lessons, like rewiring and becoming a different version of yourself is there are so many layers. So what used to happen is I would let fear like totally run the show and I would just like hide. I would like disappear. I would maybe just like write emails because that doesn’t feel quite the same as like showing up with like my face on video on social media. So I would run my business from like behind the scenes and really like not come on the front stage very much. And then like I really wasn’t doing much though. Like I wasn’t really running my business. I was just kind of like maintaining it. But this time, I was so busy, like I’ve been so busy, so nonstop, working on so many different things in my business, so I didn’t recognize this same pattern because it showed up wearing a different mask. This time, it was like busy work. I was still afraid. There was another still little layer of fear of, um, it was much less like stark and obvious and heavy and this big looming fear and this anxiety. It was more just like, like I said, another like hidden layer of this fear of being seen and fear of showing up. Um, but instead of it just like making me stop everything, I found myself subconsciously just throwing myself into busy work. So I like redid my website myself instead of delegating that. And like, I had all these good reasons and excuses why I was like, no, no, no, no, I have to do it. Like, bitch, no, you don’t. I mean, I did it and it’s done. It looks great. But I started like throwing myself into busy work like that. And, um, the rebrand like took way longer than it needed to take. Like I just subconsciously was creating all this busy work and extending the time that everything needed to take and throwing myself into all these behind the scenes tasks. And I stopped creating consistent social media content. I stopped going live. I stopped like, I would even go like days without posting to my story. And I normally, I love posting to my story. I love connecting with you guys there. So. I was not being that unapologetic, bold version of myself that I know I can deliver. And I know that that delivers massive value to people. But instead of just hiding and stopping altogether, I threw myself into busy tasks. So it’s like, we have to watch out for how our patterns, how our fears, how our perfectionism shows up wearing different masks to try to trick us. Because subconsciously, if that’s the programming, then that’s the pattern you’re going to repeat. It just might show up a bit differently. So why wasn’t I showing up? Why was I subconsciously throwing myself into busy work and distracting myself from what I know works in my business? What I know is like the lifeblood of my business, social media content. Fear, plain and simple, again, wearing a different mask, fear of judgment, fear of failure, fear of being too much, fear of getting people coming for me or disagreeing with me or getting upset with me. And again, it was such a different layer. It was so far underneath. It was like a diff, I was afraid of a different kind of judgment. I was afraid of a different kind of failure that wasn’t what I had originally worked through, if that makes sense. Um, but the thing is that fear is a liar and it keeps you stuck. It was keeping me from, cause your brain always wants to keep you safe, right? So my subconscious mind was like, we got to keep her safe. So we’re going to not subconsciously, we’re going to create all these busy tasks so that she’s not showing up on social media. And I’ve realized. The more I let that fear run the show and I don’t have the self-awareness to notice when it is coming up in a different way, the more I dilute the power I bring to the table. So I made a decision in that practice coaching call to stop hiding behind fear and really move into this next layer of stepping fully into who I am, flaws and all, And I made a deal with myself that social media content creation was going to come to the front of my day. I have like my personal stuff, like my Becoming Her daily ritual that I do every day. Things like that, like other things in my business that are important, but social media content creation happens every single day. It doesn’t matter if it’s a live stream while I’m recording a podcast episode. If I create like a bunch of reels and batch a bunch of content if I just do like a photo and caption post but something needs to go on social media every single day and that is my new rule. Of course there’s things where like I give myself Sundays and if I’m not doing well and I need to take a minute I will do that but because I need a minute not because I’m being afraid and avoiding. There’s a big difference there. And so, out of this, this practice coaching session, the other big like slap in the face moment was like this conversation with her name was Carol my fellow student coach wasn’t was Carol, and I’m so glad we’re partners that day because we were able to both really help each other, but. The other slap in the face moment from that realization, like I left that call and just started spiraling in like a good way and like just noticing like, oh my God, this pattern is everywhere. It’s not just social media. There’s other parts of my business that require me to be seen and really show up. And I am not doing that. So I realized as part of this conversation later that evening that I was not giving enough value. I am normally like such a generous person, like such a giver. Generosity is one of my top three core values. And I it just naturally comes out of me. But because like that fear was just that underlying fear was keeping me from showing up and keeping me from really owning myself and owning my platforms, I was really not having a lot of content ideas coming to me, which is super rare for me. I’m like a content generating machine. So I was in this stage of my business where I was just doing enough to get by, thinking that it was like good enough, but it really wasn’t. I was not bringing the full depth of what I know I can offer. I wasn’t delivering the quality content or the insights that I know I’m capable of. I was playing it very safe, putting out content that was just convenient rather than really going all in and creating from a place of serving and support, from a place of abundance. You know what I realize is like when you show up with half energy, half value, half ass, you get half results, period. It is truly as simple as that. I had to stop checking boxes off and being like, okay, I emailed my list this week. I emailed my list, you know, today I, um, posted something like I just regurgitated content. It’s fine. Um, you know, I’ve checked in with, I love running the memberships and that never, that always excites me. But it’s like the public content where like you don’t know who’s seeing you or what they’re going to think or what they’re going to say. So I had to stop just checking the boxes and really start asking myself, like getting back to the purpose of this, which is service. How can I really serve these women today? What do they need from me that will truly help them? And getting reconnected with that purpose and with my higher self, with my intuition, with the spirit of my business and the vibe that I’m trying to put out there instead of just the task list checked off, check marks done, email, sell them something, do this, do this, do this. It was just feeling so lackluster. So this one really stung too. Like I had to, I really noticed and admitted to myself that night that a lot of the time in this, like the last few months in this stage of my business, when I was emailing my list prior to this realization, like I was doing it for a while from a place of Okay, I have to do this. Like, what can I get out of this? Instead of how can I serve these women? I was chasing results, not connection. And the thing is that people can feel that energy. Everything is energy and our subconscious minds are picking up billions of bits of information every second. So they can feel that whether they consciously notice it or not. their subconscious feels it and then helps them make the decision to like not react to your content. They know when you’re emailing them because you want something versus when you’re showing up to give value to help to uplift and even like a sales email can feel like that because my sales emails that I love that I’m proud of to me they feel like that and I get a lot of feedback that they do feel like that for people. So some people that are just never going to want you to offer them anything and they just need to unsubscribe but It really hit me that night that I was not coming from a place of love or service or generosity. I was emailing hoping for conversions and sales and I really wanted to see numbers somewhere because I wasn’t seeing them on social media because I wasn’t creating the content on social media. So no shit Sherlock. Um, but I really like I wasn’t trying to genuine like genuinely connect and offer something valuable. So that’s a huge shift I had to come back to because that’s always been my jam like I naturally like. over give and give so much value and help so much. And I love doing that. So I really had to realize that fear is not only fucking me up, but it was robbing the world of my gift, my value, my generosity. And it was really like, it made me think of Moana and the movie Moana when the I’ve used this metaphor before for something else, but it always comes to mind like when her island like there’s the black like Just like this energetic like weed going up from the ocean up to her island and like sucking the life out out of the island and killing the fish and the and the resources that her people need to be to stay alive. It felt like that like that’s fear and the island is your business. It’s just siphoning out the life and it’s not just like keeping you from showing up. It’s keeping you from showing up in the right energy. It’s keeping you from being creative. It’s keeping you from being aligned. And for me, it was keeping me from giving value and being in a place of service and abundance, which is where we always want to be and not where I used to be when things were going really great. So now that I’ve called myself out, let’s talk about how I started fixing that and how you can too if any of this is resonating with you. So the first thing is, of course, like You need to own yourself fully. Own who you are fully. Stop trying to fit into someone else’s version of success, someone else’s version of yourself. When you are online sharing any amount of anything, people automatically have an idea of you that is gonna be inaccurate in one way or another because it’s just how the human mind works, but you need to own who you are fully and know that their version of you is not actually you and you don’t need to hold that up. You just need to show up and be who you truly are and love yourself so that when you disappoint somebody by being yourself and it not measuring up to the version of you they made up in their head, that it doesn’t affect you because you know who you are. So something you can ask yourself and something that I asked myself after that night, I literally just went like straight into journal mode, like started processing and like working through this and just continuing this, that coaching call without Carol, because I wanted to like, just, I didn’t, I had that realization. I was just like, Oh my God, I gotta get out of here. So I asked myself, where am I holding back? Where am I not showing up as the fullest, most powerful version of myself? And I wrote it down. And I want you to do the same and get really honest with yourself. Stop trying to pretend that it’s fine. If you’re not getting the results you want, something’s off. It’s not fine. Like, let’s find it. Where are you holding back? Where are you not fully being you and putting yourself out there? And that’s why the results are not coming back to you. So actually as part of this episode, I am creating for you a downloadable PDF that you can like, there’s prompts in there for self-reflection and space for you to like, it’s just a Google Doc. So it’s super editable and it’s totally free for you. But it’s basically gonna do some of the like programming coaching questions that I use with my clients to help you see like, where is this happening for you? Where are you not giving your true self? Not that you’re not giving enough, but where you’re holding back out of fear or out of scarcity, where you’re just not really like giving and serving and how to shift this perspective. Like, where do you need to make this shift? Um, so that’ll be really supportive of you. And you can get that at Allie Casasa.com slash B E links. So B E for business energetics links. It’s all just one word. It’s almost like B links. Like you’re being a link. Allie Casasa.com slash B E links. Okay. Step two, you need to show up consistently. This is where I really had to hold myself accountable and get my shit together. So it was like, what’s one area where I can commit to consistency right now? Where can I, I always tell my CEO club girls, if you want to create a surge of results, you need to create a surge of content or a surge of something. So I wanted a surge on social media. I was frustrated. I wanted people that are not aligned with my new message to just unfollow me and leave, which will naturally happen when you create a surge of content. And I wanted new people that were aligned with it to come in. And so where can I be consistent? Where can I commit? That’s when I decided I’m going to create social media content every single day. Like no matter what, I’m going to create it every single day. I don’t need to post it if I’m like mentally like need a break or I’m not having a good emotional day. Like I need to be emotionally and mentally healthy to post and be able to engage with comments and like handle that. But I do need to like create every day if I’m not needing like an energetic break. I’m not going to not create because I’m too busy or out of fear or let my subconscious mind trick me into thinking I’m too busy when I’m really just avoiding. So that’s when I made that commitment. So maybe for you, it’s the same thing showing up daily on social media. Maybe it’s delivering a weekly email or getting back to your podcast, but pick something that’s going to move the needle forward in your business and deliver value and create that surge. So you get a surge of results back. and stick to it. Consistency builds trust and trust builds results. Um, and then the next thing I mentioned it in the realization part of this episode, but delivering more value. I looked at like, where could I go deeper in my work? Where could I offer more without holding back? Where was I operating out of fear? So not just the fear of being seen and fear of judgment, but like fear of people. Like maybe I started to get into like, when you, when you have fear in you, it will start to like bleed over into other areas. So. I started to notice once I realized that I had this fear still in there, I started to notice that it was hiding in other areas that I normally do not care and don’t have any fear. So fear of like people, people stealing my content, people copying me, which has happened my whole career and it’s never stopped me. I don’t know why all of a sudden it was just like the familiar, the not the familiarity, but like the consistent fear that I was just letting sit in there was starting to seep into other things that normally don’t bother me. So where can I offer more without holding back? Look at your content, look at your products, look at your services. Are you just doing enough or are you going all in from a place of abundance and servitude? The more you give, the more you receive. It is universal law. So I had to get back to that value. I started emailing like almost every day and my emails just got so much better. Like I really just started coming from a place of service. I started doing a weekly class where every week I go live and I talk to people about my method. I invite them. They can bring their questions and if they have never come to the class before they get an opportunity to join the collective even though it’s closed. Like I just started creating opportunity for value, for support, for help, for options, for abundance and things really began to shift. The other big shift that I made that I want to walk you through that’s also in the free worksheet that I’m giving you guys is shifting to a place of service. So not just more value, but really serving. So I have this post-it that I keep on my computer. It’s in front of me right now. And it says, Everything I create comes from a place of service, love, and abundance. So the next time you send an email, the next time you create a piece of content, ask, how can I make this about service? How can I serve my audience today? Instead of focusing on the followers you hope to gain, the engagement you hope is on it, what you’re hoping to get from it, shift to producing from a place of thinking about what you’re giving. Not only is this going to detach you from the ideal outcome of how you want everything to be, But it’s also gonna just put you in such a better energy. And again, people’s subconscious minds are picking up on that and they’re gonna feel that. When you come from a place of love and help and care and service, the results will follow naturally over time, even if they don’t right away. So go and get your free worksheet. I’m going to still wrap this up, but a reminder, alexazza.com slash be links. And I want to leave you with this. If you’re not seeing the results you want in your business or your life, ask yourself where you’re not showing up fully. Where are you holding back? Where are you playing small? Where are you scared? The journey of entrepreneurship is about constantly checking in with yourself and asking, am I giving what I’m capable of giving? Am I showing up as my true self? Am I being consistent? Am I coming from the energy that I want to receive back? And if the answer is no, it’s okay, but acknowledge it and start making the changes, because it is never too late to shift. And these, like, if I had been getting the results I wanted on social media, I never would have come across that fear. The shitty results that we’re so frustrated with are usually our allies and signals that something needs to be looked at, otherwise we would never have noticed it. The breakthrough comes when you stop playing small, you stop coming from a place of producing to get, and you start owning your power and coming from an energy of service. Your action step for the week is pick one area where you know you’ve been holding back. Maybe it’s your content. Maybe it’s how you’re showing up for your audience. Maybe it’s even how you’re showing up for yourself and commit to showing up fully this week and get really specific with what that means and what that looks like. and be consistent with value from a place of service. And if you need accountability, I am here for it. Share your commitment with me on Instagram, post this episode, tag me, let me know what you’re working on and let’s hold each other accountable. Together, like we need to just, women need to support women. We need to lock arms and we need to stop playing small and start stepping into our natural power and helping each other So that’s it for today, my friends. If this episode hit home for you, do me a favor, subscribe to the podcast, leave a review, lifeblood for a podcaster, especially a new one like this. Share with someone who needs this message, sharing your entrepreneur groups, sharing your masterminds, share with your business friends. And remember you are capable of so much more than you’re giving yourself credit for. It is time for us to step up and claim it and start producing the good shit that’s really in us. I love you and I’ll see you next week.

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