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intentional living

Ep 131: You’re Paying For Your Home. Do You Even Like It?

December 11, 2019

I'm allie.

I'm an NLP, EFT and mindset certified coach, top podcaster and bestselling author. I'm here to help women transform their lives into their desired reality through self-concept work & neural energetic wiring.

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The Becoming Her Blueprint leverages neuroscience and proven strategies to help you rewire your habits and mindset, empowering you to systematically transform your life and become the next level version of yourself.

I think it’s important to ask yourself hard questions, to reevaluate life and how you do things and see if you’re really where you want to be and if you’re really happy with the way you’re doing things. And today I want to help you reevaluate the space you live in—your home. 

How we feel in our homes, or how we spend our time in our homes is a choice that we make. Even if we make it unintentionally, we’re making the decision to be either happy and content or miserable in our homes. It’s time to start being intentional. Let’s dive in! 

 

 

 

In This Episode Allie Discusses:

  • Making you house worth the money you spend on it

  • Why it’s important to be intentional with your home 

  • How to take action to be intentional with the space you live in

Mentioned in this Episode:


Declutter Like A Mother™ is my big annual challenge and it’s so fun. Every year we have tens of thousands of women sign up to simplify their homes.

I’m going to walk you through decluttering some main areas of your house – all for FREE. I just ask that you declutter for 30 minutes a day for 2 weeks. 

We start January 1st, so sign up now and invite your friends to do it with you!

 

 


Mom life. We are surrounded with the message that it’s the tired life. The no-time-for-myself life. The hard life. And while it is hard and full of lots of servitude, the idea that motherhood means a joyless life is something I am passionate about putting a stop to. I’m on a mission to help you stop counting down the minutes till bedtime, at least most days. I want you to stop cleaning up after your kid’s childhood and start being present for it. Start enjoying it. I believe in John 10:10 “that we are called to abundant life” and I know mothers are not excluded from that promise. Join me in conversations about simplicity, minimalism and lots of other good stuff that leads to a life of less for the sake of enjoying more in your motherhood. I’m Allie Casazza and this is The Purpose Show.


Hi friends! Welcome to The Purpose Show! Today I want to talk to you about getting intentional with the space that you live in. This will probably be a perspective that you haven’t really heard me talk about before. It’s a different angle and I think it’s really important to analyze where we’re at with this.

One thing that I really love to do is I love to come in and give you a different perspective, cause you to look at something in a different way, or come at it from a different angle and have a light bulb moment and a realization of, “Oh, this is how this is going. Am I okay with that? Is that what I want?”

I think it’s really important to reevaluate things, ask hard questions, and look at what it is that we’re doing in day-to-day life. Some things are just kind of accepted as normal and this is just what people do and we need to ask if that is okay with us, if that’s really how we want to be living our lives?

Here’s where I want to start with this. We all work for money. We all exchange time for money in some way. No matter how you’re making your money, your time is your money.

We are pouring our time and the money we make into our homes. Most people have a circumstance where their rent or mortgage is a really large chunk of their income, if not the biggest. So often we do that and we go about things in this sort of ho-hum way like this is just what is done and we’re spending this big chunk of money on our home.

But I want to challenge you to really look at that. Look at your house. Is it how you want it to look and feel when you walk in the door for how much time and money you spend on it? Is this a space where you feel happy to be in and less stressed than when you’re out in the world? Do you feel like when you walk into your home that there are positive thoughts and feelings coming up for you? Or do you feel like you walk in and you’re just seeing a running list of to-do’s and things that you’re behind on?

I think everybody likes being home, or most people enjoy being home, but that’s not what I mean. I mean is this space really serving you? Is it supporting the life you want to live? Is it supporting the type of mother that you want to be?

I like to show with my hands a little bit of a physical analogy so, on one hand: here’s the life that you want to live. This is representative of the type of mother you want to be, the type of wife you want to be (if you’re married), the type of lifestyle you want to live. Your home should support that and be a place where those memories can take place, where those things can happen, where that life can be lived. It is supporting it and allowing that to happen.

But so often what actually is happening is this is that even though this is the person you want to be, this is the life you want to live, this is the way you want your days to go and feel, on the other hand, you’re home (the space you live in) is actually crushing it, pushing it down, keeping you from thriving, and keeping those things from happening because it is not a space that cultivates peace and joy.

It is a place that cultivates a lot of stress. That bogs you down, That requires so much maintenance, and so much of your time and energy that you’re not able to be here. To live this life. To do these things that would mean that you’re living this life. And that’s something that we need to take a hard look at. And we need to really ask ourselves, “Is that where we’re at?”

Do your spaces or closets in your home serve in the way they are intended to? Where they’re storing things that you use and love and kind of keep things out of sight so that it’s not just a total mess everywhere. Or is it a spot in your home where things go to die? Is it that you’re just throwing stuff in there and who knows what’s back there?

If that is the way that your closets are, if there’s stuff thrown in there and you don’t really know, if you probably could go in there and declutter but you’re like, “I don’t know, it’s just where I put stuff that I don’t know what to do with, that I don’t really use.” Let me ask you this: Is that a good use of the money you’re spending on that square footage? Because you pay for your house via square footage. So, look at the square footage of that closet you’re treating that way and let’s break it down. This can be hard to look at, but I think it’s important.

How much of that closet is the square footage of your house? If your house cost $2,000 a month, it’s a 2,000 square foot home, and you’ve got 50 square feet of closet space, but the closets are total crap shoots and there’s just stuff in there you don’t really know what to do with and it’s not really serving you. Like you hope no one opens it when they come over. It’s messy and it’s littered with stuff you couldn’t make a decision about, or stuff you just put somewhere so it would be out of sight. Well then, that means you’re spending $50 a month on a storage house for things you don’t even use or seem to want. It’s not an intentional piece of your life. It’s not supporting the life you want to live. It’s just there.

I think this is about really seeing this for what it is. Are we creating a space where we’re inspired? Where we can create memories with our families? This is where the people that you’re raising are going to look back and know that was their childhood. That’s where they grew up. Even if you move a lot, the different homes that you live in are going to have a general feel.

What if you have an entrepreneur in your family, what if you’re raising an entrepreneur? Is your home a space where they feel like they can be creative and come up with ideas because it’s not super cluttered, full of junk, really stressful and mom wasn’t nagging, freaking out, and yelling all the time because it was always so much to clean up and nobody was helping enough?

All this matters. This matters. It goes back to the quote that I’m constantly referencing by Annie Dillard, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” So, is how you’re spending your days right now how you want to have spent your life when all is said and done?

Or don’t even look that far ahead to when all is said and done cause it’s morbid, intense, and sometimes hard to imagine. Let’s just look ahead a few years. Think about three years from now, how old will your kids be? How old will you be? Is how you’re spending your days right now—the amount of time you’re spending on your home, how your kids’ childhoods feel, how your days as a family feel—is that taking you where you want to be in just three years? Yes or no?


Friends, if you haven’t heard already, it is almost time for another round of Declutter Like A Mother. Declutter Like A Mother is my annual challenge. We’ve done it for years. I think this is our fourth time and it’s so fun. It’s really big. Everyone waits for it. We get loads and loads and tens of thousands of sign-ups every time. It’s really, really cool to see so many women working toward the same thing that you’re working toward, all at the same time. It is a free challenge and I love running it.

This year is actually the first year that it looks a little bit different. I’ve made a lot of changes to make the challenge give you the best results possible.

It’s not as long this time. It’s not as overwhelming this time. We’ve really simplified this simplicity challenge.

Sign up! You just go to alliecasazza.com/DLAM. You can sign up. Again, it’s free!

We are starting January 1st and you’ve gotta be there! You don’t want to miss any of it. Go sign up! Totally free! I can’t wait to see you there!


Clutter is the physical manifestation of what is going on inside of you. It is a joy stealer. It literally is stealing your time and it’s representative of what you’ve got going on inside yourself.

So, is your home is a disaster? Is it super messy? Is it taking so much of your time and energy so that you’re not a very happy person. You’re not a very happy mom. You’re stressed out a lot. You spend a lot of your time, your nights, and your weekends catching up on laundry, dishes, and housework. A lot of conversation that you have with your kids is you being upset about how they’re not helping enough or there being stuff out everywhere.

How are you treating your space? Is your space really worth the time and money you’re pouring into it? If you’re spending the money you’re spending on it—even if you own your home flat out, if you’re one of those people that inherited a home or paid for it already and you own it—is how it’s set up right now worth the money? 

Are you treating it like it matters, like it’s valuable? All of that money, all of that time and effort we spend on our homes, is it a space that is supporting the life you want to live?

I think that it’s important to mention that as this episode is going live, it’s the holiday season and the holiday season is when most people like their home a lot. It’s decorated, there’s cooking and baking happening, you’re hosting company, there’s family activities, and it’s generally a time where people are really happy about their homes. They are so glad that they are renting or they purchased this home and they feel really good about it.

I want you to know that that shouldn’t be just a holiday thing that you feel. You can create a home like that year-round. And that’s how it should be. The idea that motherhood is just so hard, it’s so much to manage, it’s just tons of cleaning, and the housework is supposed to take up hours each day, it doesn’t need to be like that.

That’s a choice. Even if you make it on accident, it’s a choice that’s been made.

So, I want to invite you guys into action. You know that I am so big on taking action, so not only do I want to invite you to take action on thinking through these hard questions that I’m asking you and this perspective shift I’m offering, but I also want you to do something about your space.

One of my favorite, really quick, really easy tips for when you feel all inspired, kind of angry, and you need to do something about this is to grab an empty basket or an empty hamper and just do a surface sweep. Go and put things that you know are clutter in the bag. 

Make quick decisions. Just things that you’re like, “Why is this out? Why do I continue to use this coffee mug when I hate it? I think it’s so ugly. It’s got a chip in it. Why do I continue to use this mug?” Put it in the basket.

Go through your house and just do a surface sweep like that. What is trash? What is broken? What is pointless? What is not serving you? What do you know need to get rid of it right now and just start there.

Another thing that you can do as an action step is to make it a part of your nightly routine to declutter one small area. Just do your junk drawer. Do your entryway. Do your shoes, make decisions about your shoes. Just one area a night for a while and see how you feel.

Sign up for Declutter Like A Mother. This is an annual challenge that I host every year.

It’s so fun and so impactful and it’s going to be so good! It’s going to happen in a few weeks. Sign up for that. alliecasazza.com/DLAM. It’s totally free. It’s right there, ready for you.

Invest in the Your Uncluttered Home program. There is a reason that exists. There is a reason that more than 10,000 women have signed up for that and have seen change happen because it works and it’s a necessary step to really go all in and have a more guaranteed success story.

Another action step, get some skin in the game. In one way or another, show up for yourself and your family in this important way, whatever that looks like. Do you need to get the course because it means you put money in, you showed up and it makes you more likely to take action and really do this?

Do you need to sign up for the Declutter Like A Mother Challenge? Do you need to grab a friend and set up some kind of accountability system where you both get your house in order together, you’re helping each other and checking in with each other?

Whatever it is, get some skin in the game and show up for yourself and your family in this way. It domino effects over and spills over into so many other areas. This is huge.

This is why decluttering is life changing and people in my community echo that opinion that I share because once they try it, they see that it’s true.

It’s hard to be on the other side and to be a mom where you’re busy, you’ve got little ones, your life is really crazy. Your house is pretty. It’s nice but it’s definitely got clutter and it takes a lot of time to maintain it. But you hear me saying these things like, “Decluttering will change your life,” and “You’re literally getting more time in minutes back in your day when you do this,” and all of these things and it’s not sinking in because you’re so busy. You’re running the clock and you’re in this cycle of chaos.

Let me grab you by the shoulders, help you press pause and say that if you would just do a few simple things: get involved, put skin in the game, show up for yourself and your family and make these small changes one step at a time. But do it in a way where you’re invested in some way and so it’s important that you show up because you did something and you’re invested. You are going to see more minutes in your day, your week, and less stress on you. A happier marriage because of that less stress. A happier motherhood because of that less stress.

You’re going to see your life transform. Yes, simply from getting rid of physical items that you didn’t need. It’s the truth. Just try it.


This was an episode of The Purpose Show. Did you know there is an exclusive community created solely for the purpose of continuing discussions surrounding The Purpose Show episodes? And to get you to actually take action and make positive changes on the things that you learn here? Go be a part of it. To join go to facebook.com/groups/purposefulmamas.

Thank you so much for tuning in. If you are ready to uplevel and really take action on the things I talk about on my show, and get step-by-step help from me, head to alliecasazza.com. There are free downloads, courses, classes, and ways to learn more about what the next step might look like for you and to focus on whatever you might need help with in whatever season you are in right now.  

I am always rooting for you, friend! See ya next time!

 

Hey mama! Just a quick note, this post may contain affiliate links.

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I'm an NLP, NEE, EFT and mindset certified coach, top podcaster and bestselling author. I'm here to help women transform their lives into their desired reality through self-concept work & neural energetic wiring.

Allie Casazza

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